three strikes, you're out

have we gotten to the point in our courting code that everything is expected upfront, like a down payment on a car? or is it the same as it's always been yet more out in the open now? in the old school days, did people assume they were going to get down (or at least see some skin) right off the bat? is it history's own conspiracy to cover up rampant promiscuity in an attempt to maintain dignity and a sense of composure for the ages, or was it really more tame circa, say, the 18th century?

we now have this tug-o-war with taking the pants off that becomes frustrating and also a bit expository (figuratively). the guy doesn't have much patience--this much we know. he can handle paying for a lady's caesar salad only a couple times before he feels entitled to the goods, and simultaneously, no matter how game she is, she's playing the can't-put-out-too-soon-or-he'll-think-i'm-a-hussy game. she eats her salad, sips her appletini, and then maybe he'll get to first (whatever that is) and the chances that she'll give it up before he gives up are slim to none, and there goes that "relationship".

so now what? people getting down on the first date is nothing new, but is that now the norm? why do ladies inherently care about feelings and all that mush when men are in it for the nookie and, most often, nothing more? how exactly are we hard-wired that these things can't be altered without severe intervention from the brain, telling us to think/act differently? i have to believe that it'd be so much simpler to be able to turn these responses on and off like a control panel, but unfortunately it ain't that way. i hear about guys getting all caught up on some hot mama and they start freaking out and THINKING about things (with their brains!) and i realize that the roles we pretend to inhabit aren't always exactly the same on the inside. yes, many a lady gets in over her head by romanticizing something that just shouldn't be, but boys do this too. even men. it is amazing to see, because then i sit and think to myself how hard you guys must work sometimes to perpetuate the i-don't-give-a-f*** attitude. and yes, i know that maybe 8 times outta 10 you genuinely don't give-a, but those 2 times, oh man, they are killers.